| The bizarre jerks etc were symptoms of the neurological injury but
the doctor disbelieved it. I started to speak
during the last week of my hospital stay because I improved when I
touched rough paper which appeared to be responsible for it. Owing to
the fact that there was hardly any nerve fuel to allow me to to touch
rough textures, touching rough toilet paper altered the nerve damage
somehow to make me able to speak a bit whenever I became sufficiently
interested in doing so and then it was by muscle spasms that my speech
mechanism functioned, and I could guide speech to a certain extent to
speak mainly accurately the thoughts I wished to communicate. It has
been the same ever since. When I touched the paper, I think electric type shocks
could have flowed through my body similar to the ones experienced when coming down
with tonsillitis. I have suffered from them at other times
whenever the nerves have had a tough straining. Before that I used to speak occasional gibberish
by muscular spasms which sounded like foreign languages.
It was on the evening I started to speak that I
read out aloud a newspaper story to a fellow patient concerning
the Falklands war. He said I did it well correctly pronouncing the
Argentinean names such as Galtieri as I had heard them on TV during the
previous weeks. My intonation was instinctive and automatic.
I also stood up for a couple of seconds
around that time which was a sort of muscular spasm owing to the
neurological injury.
The 'clicking vocalisations' I guess refers to the
gyrations of my jaw from side to side for several times on each occasion
owing to muscular spasms from the neurological injury.
The reason why I did not want to be discharged
home in June 1982 was because I was not correctly diagnosed. No doctors were at home
but were in the hospital. Dr. Peter Noble had wanted to discharge me the
previous September but I refused to go then for the same reason and so had
months of indignity crawling around on the ward's floor at first* with a
sheet wrapped around me because the relapse of August 1981 from two
weeks of diazepam which damaged me more had made me unable to wear
clothes for quite a while afterwards. That benzodiazepine (basically
half of Limbitrol) had made my knowing nerves worse you see and so they
had no fuel in them to function safely at all if I knew I had clothes
on. Consequently, really *at first I was actually unable to be covered
by anything at all at times but then could get about on the floor wrapped in the sheet
and later I wore pyjamas as the nerves had improved. Up to taking diazepam
in August 1981 I was getting about in a wheelchair clothed and was
speaking a little. |